“I am going home to strum my mando.”
Try not to think too hard about how to tighten Dave’s strings. I shall quickly distract you, as a good momma should, with photographs of my own antique mandolin.
Look at these, shhhh, don’t cry, look, pretty, mother-of-pearl inlay, shhhhh, don’t cry, Dave put his away, shhhhh….
Okay. You ready to talk about Spiderman now? You okay? All better?
Okay, now that you feel better, I am pleased to announce I will be writing a true crime book about this case, using this episode as a starting point. Working title: Turtlenecks and Mandolins: The Denver Spider Man Story. Very excited.
Horror movie of this particular creepycrawly bent for your entertainment: The People Under The Stairs, a Wes Craven special edition spookfest.
I dare you to watch it without, at some point, gripping the cushion or bedspread on which you perch. And I quote: “It is TIME to CLEAN HOUSE!” woooohahahaha. You’re welcome, loveys.
Another lovey horror reference charmed into my twisted mind by Dave and Gareth, specifically by the image of the “ghost’s” chattering teeth: The Chatterer Cenobite from the Hellraiser series. It’s rather, um, disturbing, especially to those with odontophobia. Luckily, I found the cutest lil Chatterer ever. Thanks to cenobite.wikia.com, I present Lego-Chatterer!
God, I love writing for this website.
Finally, the Dave-unit’s afternoon-weirdo daily movie, Bad Ronald, is not only available, but it was based on a novel, which is also available. Punk rock. Also, I love the righteous cover art. Nice. Imagine going to pee and coming back to see this in your bedroom.
Oh, and the actual Denver Spiderman, Theodore Coneys? Murderpedia.org, for your detailed pleasure. (Turtlenecks and Mandolins, baby.)
Bands from this episode:
- Animal Accuracy
Cultural references from this episode:
- Hunchback of Notre Dame: novel, really odd Disney version
- Nosferatu: Murnau, Herzog, Joe Hill’s incredible novel NOS4A2, and apps!–Nosferatu: Run From the Sun 1 and 2. Long fingers and a weird face never looked so cute.
- Gomer Pyle
- Ghostface Killah
- and the Kool-Aid Man
Oh, and one more horror recommendation/reference: remember X-Files Season 1.3, “Squeeze“? Tooms’ skinnnnny fingers? Yeah. Oh, yeah.